Just Send the Text: An Expert's Guide to Letting Go of the Stress and Anxiety of Modern Dating (Paperback)
Say goodbye to the crippling stress and anxiety that come with dating in the 2020s with the dating advice all single people need.
Have you ever convinced yourself that your crush is definitely not into you because they didn’t watch your Instagram story? Have you ever pretended that you didn’t want anything serious because you assumed your potential partner didn’t want anything serious with you? Have you ever spent hours figuring out the “perfect” response to your date’s text? Well Candice Jalili, senior sex and dating writer at Elite Daily, has done all of those things and she’s here to tell you to stop. Stop giving in to your anxieties and insecurities. Stop replaying and rehashing every interaction. Stop thinking that you’re not good enough exactly the way you are. Instead, take a deep breath and just send the text.
In today’s society, dating can be stressful. And Candice gets it: between social media, dating apps, the hookup culture, and just, you know, the patriarchy—there’s no denying it; dating is hard. But there’s no reason for dating to transform you into a ball of stress. Laid out in seven easy-to-follow steps, Just Send the Text will help you to let go of any dating-related stress and anxiety by accepting that, for the right person, just being yourself is more than enough.
The book is filled with helpful tips including:
-Don’t be afraid to block someone on social media
-Embrace dating apps as one of the many ways to meet a potential partner
-Stop wasting your time trying to convince someone you’re worthy of theirs
-Being vulnerable might hurt in the short-term, but it will benefit you in the long-run
Featuring first-person interviews with real women, visual aids, and compelling statistics, Just Send the Text will give you the courage to put yourself back out there, embrace dating once again, and find a real, authentic kind of love in today’s world.
About the Author
Candice Jalili was born in San Francisco and raised right across the Golden Gate in Marin County. After graduating college from Santa Clara University, she decided to move to New York to work for Elite Daily, where she currently holds the title of Senior Sex and Dating Writer. Candice’s musings on relationships can also regularly be found in Cosmopolitan, Tinder Swipe Life, The Cut, Time, and more. She covers pretty much every topic you and your friends discuss over boozy brunch—from why you’re still thinking about your ex to the latest celebrity hookup. She’s also really, really, really over smart, cool women sacrificing their own sanity in an attempt to “get the guy.”
"Candice is like the ghost whisperer of millennial dating. Whether you’re just starting to put yourself out there or your heart’s been broken too many times to count, she’ll meet you exactly where you’re at—judgment free!”—Iman Hariri-Kia, sex and relationships editor at Bustle
"As the former sex and relationships editor at Cosmopolitan, Elite Daily, and Women’s Health, I wish I had Just Send the Text to give to every reader, podcast listener, and friend who ever asked me for advice. This book has EVERY ANSWER that anyone who’s currently dating or in a situationship could possibly need. And, the best part is, Candice delivers it all in her signature hilarious and self-effacing way. She also fact checks every truism with real stories from realpeople, plus cold, hard science (that honestly, even long-term cou-ples should familiarize themselves with). If you’ve ever had one of those moments where your heart is beating a million times a minute, your face is hot AF, the hairs on your arms are standing up, and your breathe is caught in your throat because you have no idea what to do next with that person you like, do yourself a huge solid and read this book. I’m not overselling it when I say the lessons in here will change your life. Trust me: I’m a former Eunice, too.”—Faye Brennan editor-in-chief of Eat This, Not That!
"Just Send the Text is the dating advice book millennial women have been waiting for. Candice Jalili is the only writer who understands the extreme specificities of dating in the modern age, and her advice is fresh, relatable, and downright hilarious. It’s impossible to finish Just Send the Text without feeling inspired to take the reins on your dating life.”—Alexia LaFata, editor at New York magazine
“In looking for love, a relationship should enhance your life rather than make you feel less than. Since self-doubt hijacks you from joy, I’m happy Candice Jalili is encouraging people to trust their intu-ition to ultimately form more fulfilling connections, within and with others.”—Jennifer Taitz, author of How to be Single and Happy
"With grace, humor, and a breadth of knowledge, Candice Jallili has written an incredible book for millennials and beyond, tapping into universal dating challenges that most women have dealt with at one time or another. She helps us to let go of preconceived notions of happily ever after, the pressure of finding the 'one,' and settling out of feelings of inadequacy or fear of being alone. The book is also a plethora of information with facts and stats about societal issues related to being single or in a relationship. Candice uses interviews with women across generations, reaching into their hearts and helping us all to feel heard and connected to. Beyond all of this, she reaches her audience in a profoundly relatable way, helping women to look deep within themselves to find their true authenticity. —Niloo Dardashti, PsyD, HHP, adult, couples, and workplace psychologist
"If dating ever makes you anxious, this book is a must-read. Candice gets it—and her signature blend of empathy and humor will have you hooked. This book feels like a hug from your wise big sister who’s been in your shoes.”—Hannah Orenstein, author of Head Over Heels
"For half a decade, I’ve loved devouring Candice Jalili’s thousands upon thousands of sex and dating articles that span across every relevant byline on the internet. Just Send the Text takes Jalili’s ex-pert-driven advice and empowering message to a whole different level. In her heartfelt and bitingly real debut book, Jalili inspires a generation of young women to not only release themselves from the shackles of modern-day dating anxiety but to garner freedom and authenticity in every aspect of their lives. Make no mistake, Just Send the Text isn’t just a book about falling in love with another person, its core message lies in learning how to fall in love with yourself —in all your messy, beautiful, unique glory. Jalili’s whipsmart yet wildly accessible (and refreshingly humorous!) voice carries the key to the most life-enhancing lesson of all: how to get over the fear of rejection and live a life that honors your fabulous, wild, authenticity.”—Zara Barrie, author of Girl, Stop Passing Out in Your Makeup: The Bad Girl’s Guide to Getting Your Sh*t Together
"Dating books of the past twenty years will tell you that you can trick someone into loving you by playing games, and knowing the exact minute to second ratio for text backs. Jalili busts this notion out of the water with her acknowledging the real anxiety behind dating and how you are getting in your own way. Her humor, knowledge, and lived experience helps the women of 2020 to use our voices, know ourselves, and just send the text. When Jalili talks about 'Eunice,' she’s speaking about all of our inner anxious dependent voices, the one we feel shame and embarrassment about. Her humor and lived experiences allow us to look at that part of ourselves with an honest giggle and a breath to take a real look at ourselves and our ‘part’ in the situation. Excited to share this book with my clients and colleagues!”—Emmalee Bierly, LMFT, couples and sex therapist, owner of the West Chester Therapy Group, and co-host of The Shrink Chicks podcast.
"Jalili’s Just Send the Text is an absolute must-read for any woman battling dating anxiety (hi, all of us!). Each page helps—and encour-ages the reader in a super cute older sister-y kind of way—let go of the stress that comes with planning dates, initiating the first move, and the dreaded reply time debate. Be prepared to share this book with your group chat because, yup, you will feel personally victimized by the advice in here, you will think 'Omg, it’s me!' every two pages, and you will be a better dater because of it. Promise.”—Taylor Andrews, assistant editor Cosmopolitan
"How many hours, days, and—be honest—years have you spent worrying about how to communicate with someone you like? Set yourself free with Just Send the Text, a good friend in book form, that walks you through your panic with, let's face it, more patience than your friends actually have." —Glamour